What is patience? When do we know we have patience? Is it the result from diligent efforts? Or do all people possess patience, just some people have more than others? The joke is a person who asks to have patience but they want it now. The word patience or patient occur 32 times throughout the Bible. The common Bible passage people choose is from the first chapter of James that patience or to be patient appears to be the absolute or highest quality as a result of enduring “various trials”. We immediately dislike that. Another running joke is to not ask God for patience because that automatically makes us a target for a difficult time; so it is just best (because we always like to avoid anything difficult or hard) is to live life without too much or to have the least amount of troubles or trials in life. So if we must endure, do we get to claim the victory and have patience after a single test or after a major trial to then sit back on our laurels, to breathe a sigh of relief that we didn’t die, and apply patience on our chest as if it were a medal won or an award given to a child in school?
When we look at the fruits of the Spirit—often viewed as a list of achievements, attitude, or quality to attain—we, unfortunately (for us), don’t see patience specifically in that list. In a 1755 dictionary, the word patience means, “The power of suffering; indurance; the power of expecting long without rage or discontent; the power of supporting faults or injuries without revenge; long suffering.” Anyone who has heard me over the past year knows my definition for long suffering means to bear up and to help a person who is hurt, defeated, or not as spiritually mature to make it to the finish line. Sin, pain (physical and emotional), or suffering are difficult to accept and yet we are called to either be more mature, spiritual, loving, or stronger to help each other.
But as James the Lessor continues in James 1, “But let patience have its perfect work, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking nothing”. We all cheer, “yay” because a singular trial ended and sometimes a person will comment “that person has the patience of a saint”. But when does the fulfillment of that perfection and completion come? For most of us, we just want a “one and done” and be past that event. In short (yes, Robert, get to the point quickly because I don’t have the patience to read this longer because I want patience NOW) and the biggest question, how long do we suffer? 1 Corinthians 13:4 (the chapter of love) begins that verse with, “Love suffers long and is kind”. And for James (and others examples we see in the Bible), we see that they truly did have patience to endure people or things a lot longer or better than we.
So how long? When is it time to cut our losses? When is it time to move on or walk away? When is it time or acceptable to work with someone else and while validated to let others fall through the cracks? When is it time to stop waiting and start doing, to stop striving and to achieve? While reading Psalm 95 this morning (to which I’ve probably read nearly a hundred times or so by now) we read about celebrating victory in the presence of Jesus, my singular favorite verse in that psalm is verse 7, and then we read about God dealing with sinning Israel for 40 years while in the desert. Admittedly when I end that psalm prior to this morning, I would read it in the perspective of this being only a biography, just stating obvious or known facts, and how when people rebel that there is judgment. So we determine that there must be a time for how long to deal someone or a matter and then it is time to let go or judge if the event or person is unyielding to change. To discern when that time is, that almost seems like the impossible gift to attain. Even Peter asked Jesus, how many times do I forgive my friend, up to seven times? Here’s Peter who thought he was being very spiritual by using the number seven, the number of perfection and completeness, thinking by using this extreme, he is very forgiving and patient with people. Jesus returned it with 490 times (some commentators parenthetically insert in a single day over the same offense). In short, we never stop forgiving and being patient with people or situations.
But are we not supposed to judge? Are we supposed to separate or be different to a point to establish clear or defined boundaries? Are we not supposed to be holy for God is holy, so that means cut off or cut away people who don’t measure or live up to that expectation? In the short term and especially when dealing with a new Christian, I recommend the Jesus approach which is found in three of the four Gospels but we will use Matthew 9:9-13. I heard someone say that the most judgmental place there is is the church because often we, especially in this example, will easily choose to side with the Pharisees. And before we adjust our crooked halos on our horns, there is a difference between living righteous and being a rules-based Pharisee hypocrite. Rules don’t get us to heaven and rules do not keep us saved, PERIOD. And because of this, this is why we have hang ups with people who come into our lives with what I call baggage (a past), sins, or character traits that bother us. Whether criminal or hard-baked habits or addictions (also character traits/flaws), these are the people we show little patience toward despite them giving their lives to Christ. We love the stories of, I just got saved, threw out my girlfriend from my house, next day I got a job making lots of money, and by the next church service telling the pastor that he is Called to be a missionary so pastor disciple me. And although there are what I call radical conversions where lots of things break off easily and quickly, there are within those same people prejudices and character flaws that will eventually surface. Those take time, sometimes even years before working on those issues. And then there are people like me who some things dropped off easy after accepting Christ but there were things that were so ingrained in our character (up to that point, a lifetime of poison put into us) that it took YEARS for those things to be dealt with and methodically and carefully (by God’s grace and help) removed.
But that is the problem that we have. Going back to Psalm 95 when we look at the last few verses (as well as other psalms and the beginning of the Bible), we are reminded of swift judgment against the likes of Miriam (leprosy), Korah (earth opening up and swallowing thousands), and Achan (for taking what God said not to) and expect swift judgment toward people (after all bad things happen to bad people; the law of reaping and sowing) to either “turn or burn” (or stop it immediately because I don’t have the time and patience to deal with you; I want easy people to work with who get it and are immediately changed). We remember the serpents killing off people. We remember times of swift judgment. And so we feel empowered as if we are God Himself to exact judgement, kick people out of our lives or out of church or at the very least make the person feel extremely uncomfortable/unwelcomed toward us, without any consideration as to the facts or details. And sadly with no regard to them staying saved or going to heaven; too much work.
Despite these select people judged in the Bible, the remaining millions of Israelites were not judged swiftly, even if they deserved it (such as secret sin as we often hear preached against). So what if people need more patience or a longer time of patience? 40 years passed and people died off, as Psalm 95:8-11 says. But note something: 40 years. Not four minutes after leading someone to Jesus we want to immediately fix their life as if years of garbage filled in will take a day or so to uproot and empty out (anyone who has helped clean out a house that once belonged to an elderly couple/person knows how much accumulation of things and how long it takes to discard, sell, or give away that stuff). It took nearly 15 years from the time David was anointed king until he became king. It took between 15-20+ years for Joseph to go from dreamer to second in Egypt. It took 25+ years (25 for promise and then 9 months) for Abraham to have the promised son Isaac. It took years of Isaac dealing with mean neighbors before he finally could settle in and have peace. It took 21+ years for Jacob to return to his home land from when he set off to Laban’s. It took 10 years from the day of Pentecost and Peter preached and thousands got saved until God dealt with Peter’s prejudice over Gentiles to make him fit to preach to Cornelius, even then Paul later had to rebuke Peter for being a hypocrite and going back on his attitude toward Gentiles. It took 400+ years before Moses led the Hebrews to the promise land. It took nearly 400 years from the time of Malachi’s last words until Jesus came on the scene. It took thousands of years for the promised Messiah to come to redeem mankind. And it has taken thousands of years since then and continues to go until God decides to close the book and rapture His people. 2 Peter 3:9 says, “The Lord is not slack concerning His promise, as some count slackness, but is longsuffering toward us, not willing that any should perish but that all should come to repentance.”
And while dealing with the matter of patience and time, we fixate on the time part. It is like waiting near the microwave or toaster over for the ding so we know the food is done cooking. The answer is, patience is a life-long forbearance for various people or situations. What?! That long?! But I want… It is funny how we append an amount of time to be patient toward someone else, we want a short time to endure our problems (ask anyone who stands in lines at the store), but we want everyone else to extend as much time and patience toward us (in fact, we expect it). To take this even further, how long has God waited for us to repent of that matter, to change that attitude, to forgive that person, to move past that violation, to stop doing that habit, to stop living with that character flaw, to…get the picture? Has it been a life time perhaps on some things? And perhaps with many people, myself included, if we have been forgiven much ought we not to forgive much in others? We were loved much, ought not we to love others much? And if God is patient and longsuffering toward us, ought not we be patient and longsuffering toward others? “Now may the God of PATIENCE and comfort grant you to be like-minded toward one another, according to Christ Jesus, that you may with one mind and one mouth glorify the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ,” Romans 15:5-6, emphasis added.